I’ve watched quite a few horror movies in my day: in fact, I love them. I’ve often made comments about how people respond when the murderer is after them. “Oh sure, run upstairs where there are no exits”, or “Why can’t you stop screaming and be quiet?” I’ve wondered how I would respond in some absurd, would-never-happen scenario, like in a horror movie. I personally believe I would be up for the task, fight my way to survival, and show that murderer they messed with the wrong one. Many experts would say it’s not really an option or choice; it is a pre-built-in biological reaction that occurs. Some people would become paralyzed by fear, when faced with a horrific situation; and some become uncontrollably hysterical. The fact is that on some level, every day, we are reacting to something. We go to work, we interact with other people; we deal with our kids, parents, and relationships. All the while, we are presented with causation. All day long, we are reacting to our environment and the people in it, with both external and internal dialogue.
So many of us are walking around believing they have no control over the outcome of their day, or even their lives. Most of us have not set an intention to not internalize negative information by twisting it inward, causing it to point back at you, resulting in feelings of guilt, shame, helplessness and ultimately unhappiness. It is within your power to choose exactly how you respond. It is within your control to choose what information you want to internalize and how you want to digest it in order to feed your soul with positive, uplifting, and supportive information. You can choose to work toward a goal of improving your relationships with others as well as yourself by having intention when you respond to people and situations. Learning to control your responses by asking yourself if you are meeting your goal of wanting to improve relationships and remove negative thoughts and feelings from your life, or are you just emotionally reacting likely from a place of old wounds. So, how would you react if Freddy Kruger gets into your nightmares? It depends. It depends on how you’ve managed yourself and your reactions on a day-to-day basis. Have you been out-of-control, letting negative emotions rule you or do you control your reactions to be based on your consistent goal of having healthy relationships with the people in your life, which brings connectedness and happiness.
I believe horror comes in all shapes and sizes. I sincerely doubt that a dead man will ever attack me in my sleep, as you’d find in a scary movie, but I have experienced my own horrific situations in life. With each one, my eyes have been further opened, and I became more astutely aware of what truly matters in life. My mentor would say that you have to get hit by enough busses before you are actually ready for good therapy work. I’ve been hit by some big freakin’ busses and one thing I know for sure is that we can all control our responses and reactions in order to align them with the healthy life we want and deserve.
We can’t change others, but knowing the importance and impact of your own behavior and intention, changes everything.