Where are you on a scale from 1 to 10 with self-awareness? Your sense of self is your ability to differentiate between your self and others; the capacity to separate feelings and thoughts. People with a blurry sense of self cannot distinguish feelings from thoughts; when asked to think, they are flooded with feelings, and have difficulty thinking logically and basing their responses on that. They have difficulty separating their own feelings from other’s feelings; they look to family members or their spouse to define how they think about issues, feel about people, and interpret their experiences.
Having a blurry sense of self will have an effect on your relationships, your work, and most of all, your level of true happiness and connectedness. When who you are is dependent upon how others feel about you, it’s impossible to truly connect with another person without blurring yourself into them.
People with a high sense of self, a high level of self-differentiation, are able to experience intimacy; they are able to experience closeness in their relationships while still maintaining their own individuality. Learning how to differentiate is a process of freeing yourself from your family’s processes to define yourself.
This means being able to have different opinions and values than your family members, all while being able to stay emotionally connected to them. It means being able to calmly reflect on conflicted interactions, realizing your own role in it, and then choosing an appropriate and peaceful response rather than just reacting from flooded emotions.
Let me help you work on raising your sense of self … call or text for an appointment at 317-213-5221.